I hate my body .. :(

I've been dieting since easter. Homemade salad, wheat pasta (only once a week), basically no bread .. Low calories, low carbs and low fat and exercise ....

I gained 3 pounds :( .. Initially I lost 7 pounds but it looks as if the scale is going up.

My fight with PCOS is a losing battle. I give up.

Then and now..

Today we went to the Fourth Annual Baby Jubilee. Our RE, Dr, N, has an event where he invites all the parents who have had a live birth (from ART) in the last four years. It's at the Seasons and very nice. I love all the babies you see. Singles, twins, triplets all in one room. It's great. The food is fantastic. We didn't go the first year because the girls hadn't arrived yet but we've gone to the last three. Next year is our last one but we took some great photos tonight but before I show any I wanted to take a stroll down memory lane.

The girls were 9 months old in this photo. Karly is being held by a wonderful man. His name is Dr. N. He was my reproductive Endocrinologist. If you've been a long time reader, you know that my relationship with this dr was a long one. I've cried on his shouldler, yelled at him, doubted him and even walked away from him but when I was ready to talk to him, he always welcomed me back and put me at the top of his list. When they raised the prices $2000 and it looked like we were going to get smacked again, he told us not to worry about it. He gave us our money back after both failed attempts and called me himself to tell me I was pregnant. I love this man to pieces and thank God for him daily.

This was last year. I love seeing how much the girls have grown in just a year.

This year we weren't able to get a picture with Dr. N because the girls weren't having it but they did say "Hi" to him and we talked to him for awhile. He asked me if I was done or if I wanted to try again. I told him we were blessed with these two and they completed our family. He said I had such a hard, long road trying to get pregnant with these two, he understood why. He said they were beautiful and I hugged him and thanked him again for my beautiful girls.


Girls, 9 months old (First Baby Jubilee)
Girls, 34 months old (Third Baby Jubilee)
Girls, 9 months old

Girls, 22 months old (Second Jubilee)


Girls, 34 months old (Third Baby Jubilee)

We found out tonight that they are going to have them for the first five years then have a huge one at 10 years. I hope we are able to come back here for it as in 6 years I hope we aren't living here haha.

Big news!

Today we met with Katie's occupational therapist after Katies evaluation. She is now advanced in everything she was delayed in and there isn't really any evidence to support their previous thoughts of an Auditory Processing Delay. They told us to keep letting her go outside and explore her surroundings, to let her take things in and she will grow and learn naturally.

We are so proud of her. Not too long ago I was sitting in the hallway after her initial evaluation crying and now she's surpassed her goals. We will continue to help her the way we have been the last few months. June 29th will probably be her last appointment unless we terminate earlier. Right now we feel the continued one on one will still benefit her so as long as we are qualified to get the therapy, we will.

I haven't lost any weight this week but I haven't gained any weight either. I haven't worked out AT ALL (other than dancing and jumping around with 2 and 3 year olds) but I've been keeping the types of food I eat in check. I keep sugar, flour and carbs at a minimum. Your body needs a certain amount of those foods but I only eat them when combined with healthy choices but can I tell you that I want a sandwich and I want some rigitoni!!!

I need to kick my diet dr pepper habit. Dont buy it? Yeah tried that. Came home from work the other day and Donald said "Hey babe, I noticed you haven't had any soda so I bought you a 12 pack of diet dr pepper. " Thanks. haha.