When did I get big girls?

Today they were able to crawl up on mommy and daddys bed all by themselves. It's cute but sad at the same time. For weeks they've been able to get off the bed but never on. They ask for milk when they are thirsty, point to the stuff they want and we get lots of hugs and kisses.

Work is going on as usual. My routine is still overwhelming and although it's working out, selfishly it's not. I get my kids for an hour in the morning and two hours at night. It's not enough but I keep reminding myself that it's for the best and we'll get through it.

I registered them for daycare. Monday, Wednesday and Friday but the waiting list is 8-10 months long so I'm hoping they get in around June but they will def be in by Sept because I work for them and well if I don't have a spot I can't work haha.

The holidays are coming and I start to miss family like crazy. They are all 1100 miles away. I thought if I had the girls, the need to go home would go away but it doesn't. It only got stronger because now I want to bring the girls to my family for christmas and the only day I get off is christmas so there is no time to go home :(. It is what it is but I'm thinking in a few years we will get to go home for the holidays.

We are still alive..

And here's a photo to prove it ;)

Life is insane and it doesn't slow down.

I leave at 7:45 am and I don't get home until 6. By the time I get dinner ready, feed the girls, baths and bed, I'm beat. This is pure torture. I'm exhausted.

The girls are getting so big. Their babble has def started turning into words we can understand. Karly is starting to put on weight and Katie may actually get teeth and walk after all :). She had 3 top teeth come in all at the same time last week. They are 15 months old. Until now, Katie had 2 teeth and could only walk a few steps. Now she can walk..although it's a stiff legged walk..but she is still walking and has teeth! Karly has 4 molors comings through. One on each side..top and bottom and hasnt' made a peep about it. Am I blessed or what? I found them one day when she bent her head back and laughed.

They both love kissing my and laying on me and have started giving me hugs when I come home. I couldn't ask for anything more.

Some time..

As I said before, life has gotten very busy. Tomorrow is the day I usually spend with my girls but tomorrow I have to attend a seminar to get my hours. I need 8 this year, so far I'm scheduled for 19. Does that make me an overachiever? I am going to miss this so much. I will have to leave before they wake up and I will be home after 3. I'm sad :( ... However, most saturdays are spent with me and the girls going shopping, going out to breakfast, visiting daddy at work, the park etc. I love our mornings. Sundays are spent as a family. We spend lots of time out and about or just at home playing. The weeks usually go by quickly because they are so busy but it makes me value my time with them so much more. Every moment is cherished.
Here are some updated photos of the little ladies.

Walking around the park..daddy and the girls were "running bases" haha

Katies beautiful pouty face


Karly loves to use her teeth to pop the top off of her snack cup, pour the snack on the floor, eat some of it then take her sisters so she can do the same

This is what happens when you try to take Karly out of the park

She hates the slide

My skinny minnie playing at the park

My pretty baby Karly

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My pretty baby Katie

A quick post

Things have been crazy.

I am getting into a routine, I very busy routine, but it's working.

The morning starts at 530, I wake the girls up at 7. We play, read books. I take them to my mother in law, set up their breakfast and it's hugs and kisses and goodbyes. They cry once in a while when I leave but not for long and not a lot.

Work is busy. I have never had a classroom of children like this. They are only 3-4 years old but are extremely unruly. This makes it a bit harder. The director came in to observe what I had been telling her and she was shocked. She said I had never complained about a class of children before so she had to take a look. I won't go into it right now. It's late but the stories I have haha...

The girls are fantastic! Getting so so big. It does my heart good to watch how smart and well behaved they are. The other day Katie said something that sounded like "You go to work?" My mother in law thought the same thing. They are trying to talk so much more now.

More later :)

I hope everyone reading is well.

Busy Busy.

My girls are getting so big!

Katherine is starting to get the hang of standing alone. She can now get up without holding on to anything. The tubes are really making a difference. She finally has teeth! 2 little ones on the bottom! Also, she is starting to make words. She says: Hi, Bye, Mommy, Daddy, Uh-oh, baby and Juice. She has such a beautiful voice and I love hearing it. She wasn't speaking other than Mummmmmmm before her tubes. She is gaining and growing and oh so beautiful! Her blue eyes are still blue. My husband and I have hazel but my grandfather had the bluest eyes and I hope hers stay. The pedi said they should stay blue. Her favorite activity is reading books. Not me reading the books, her. She likes to sit and turn the pages, staring at each picture she sees.

Karly is a pill. She's walking now, loves to get into stuff and throw tantrums. Oh yeah, tantrums. She threw her first one in public the other day. She would not walk, would not let me pick her up and just sat there on the sidewalk screaming. Why? Because we left the video game store. She is also talking up a storm. She says: Mama, Daddy, Good girl, baby, Katie, Karly, Cup, Hi, Bye and I'm not sure if there is anything else. She is still on the small side but we are getting her to eat more and more everyday. She has 6 teeth with 2 more on the way. That isn't making anything go easier.

I've had to find a different peditrician. My current one, wants to except 1 insurance company and wants everyone do switch. Who switches insurance companies? I can't. So we are going to get another. I found a woman, she's russian and seems to be very nice. She's about 15 minutes from my house and has evening and sat hours. The receptionist was very nice and answered all of my questions (and there were a few). Overall I think we will like her. I set up their 15 month appt/flu shot for October but I think we may be seeing her next week. Karly has had a cold for a few weeks now and it isn't getting better. Yesterday she ran a fever of 101 but it was gone after tylenol and never came back. I don't know what to contribute to teething and whats not.

I'm getting stuff accomplished, I'm sure I am but it feels like no matter how much I get done I still feel like I haven't started. Today is my last workday of spending morning and afternoon with my girls. Starting on Monday, I will be back to full time. I'm happy to be going back but unhappy about missing my girls. I wish I could do both but we all know it's impossible. I know they won't forget me but I still get sad that they might. I start putting my classroom together on Monday. I have everything ready to go.

I've got the first two weeks of lesson plans done and one week turned in and approved. My boss had some notes for me, some activities she wanted me to explain in more detail and had some suggestions about others but I was proud that that was all she had to say. The best part is that when we were sitting there, I said "Wow, I expected worse". She looked at me and asked why. I told her that because I had never written early preschool plans before. I thought her chin was going to hit the floor and for a moment I thought she was going to change her mind about giving me the older kids. She said that she thought I had and I told her I hadn't. I've only worked in early preschool to cover a maternity leave and as an aid. Never a lead. She just said "Okay" and that was it. Thank Goodness.

That's it in a nut shell..a very big nutshell :)

and it begins..

My boss is moving me from the Toddler Program into the Early Preschool Program and I get to be Lead Teacher!!! Yes, it's my classroom.

I have been an assistant in this room before and I have covered the teacher while she was on maternity but I have always been with Toddlers.

The end of the summer is when my boss evaluates how each classroom ran, how much got done, what issues where there to deal with and makes changes in staffing, hours and so on.

I don't have a degree. The Early Preschool teacher now, has an associates so she is moving up to the Preschool Program (4/5 year olds). My room doesn't require a degree but my boss prefers a degree. She explained that I have had many years of Child Development courses and although she COULD hire someone with a degree, they won't have the experience and knowledge that I have. Does this make me glow, yes, do I feel like a poser, yes. Do I care? NOPE.

So, I am going to do a Backyardigans theme. Super excited and yes, when it's done, there will be pics. Okay but that's all the good, fun stuff.

(excuse hubbys messy room)

This is the curriculum for Early Preschool. I have 23 days to learn it, plan it out and get it ready. I don't have to have the entire room planned but I have to have it somewhat organized so I need to learn it in addition to getting my room prepared, run the classroom I work in now and take care of my kids.

However, I am still excited and ready to go! Speaking of which, I have to type up my daily letter for the parents..

I have the Cutest.Babies.Ever

Just sayin.....
We finally had their one year pro pics taken. I'm in love with all 159 of them :) Here's a few...

Hmm I never shared Birthday Photos!

Okay, they are in no order :) I can't believe I haven't blogged about this yet. It was a great day. The weather was beautiful, the men stopped building the house next door and everyone invited attended.

This was Katies lady bug cake...made by Mommy :)

This was Karlys butterfly cake....made my Mommy :)

This is how Karly ate cake made by Mommy

And Katie eating cake made by Mommy...

I think they liked them :)

This is the cake made by the Carlos Bakery ("cake boss")

It was soooo good. Half pineapple and custart/half strawberry and custard. It was so rich and creamy and soooooooooooo good.

Yes, she is clapping haha. I guess she liked her presents :)

My big big girl..

Today was Katies ear tube procedure. We got up at 5 and left the house at 5:30. Katie was in very good spirits.

We got her dressed in her gown and then we watched cartoons.

Such a beautiful baby..

They even had a toy room that she got to explore (while daddy played Wii).

Around 745, they brought her back. I got to go with her. I stayed with her until she fell asleep. I went back in the waiting room and cried. When they told me she was awake, I wanted to run to her. I walked in, looked around, saw my baby crying in the nurses arms, walked over and took her. I'd never felt so over protective before. She cried for a few minutes, then calmed down when we got her some juice and crackers.

In the end, all was okay. When we got home, she was laughing and playing like she had just taken a trip to the store. She had some blueberry pancakes that I had made and froze and some bananas then took a nap. I'm so happy it's over and done with.

Feeling scared..

My baby Kate has to have tubes put in her ears. Year after year, my class is filled with children that have them. I know it's not a big thing but I guess it feels like a much bigger deal when it's your baby. She has fluid in both ears. He also said that he thinks shes a bit delayed in speech and physical development.

I do understand. She babbles but she doesn't repeat words or sounds. She can't stand on her own and won't let go of what shes holding onto because she will lose her balance and fall. She will walk if you hold her hand but that's it.

So in two weeks she will have tubes put in. They said I could go in with her until she's asleep and then go back in when she's awake. All about 10 minutes. I'm still scared.

I'm trying to remember the positive. She'll sleep better. No more tossing and turning and whining in her sleep. She'll start saying words and even take a few steps. Her ears won't bother her anymore. Overall, she'll be a happier baby, although she is a very quiet happy baby now, she'll just be happier.

One year ago today..

One year ago today..I was ready to pop. I didn't go into labor though. We ended up having our scheduled c/s at 38 weeks and one day. Everyone told me how proud I should feel that I was able to carry them to term. All I wanted was them OUT.

We decided not to buy new cribs. Instead, we are using these portable cribs. They look like pack n plays but they are 20% smaller. We needed something for them to sleep when but they slept so well in them we just decided to keep them in there until we transition to toddler beds or they stop enjoying it. Whichever, we will do what needs to be done for their comfort. I was so heartbroken when they said the cribs would be destroyed.
You can see how small they are and yes, they sleep with blankets. They have since the day the were born. They won't sleep unless they have a blanket and they have two. One they lay on and one the sleep under. I think it's cute. Most of the time it ends up a big ball by their feet but they need to fall asleep.

Today was my husbands 38th birthday. We woke him up with gifts and then we went out to do girl stuff :). Their birthday is tomorrow and their party is Saturday. After work, we had a nice dinner off the grill and some ice cream cake.

Tomorrow, my girls turn 1. They've been with us a year. One beautiful year. How time does fly. These are my first and my last and I've enjoyed every moment but I feel like it was short. I just keep thinking that I have many, many more years with them. Bring it on! haha :)

Tomorrow we are taking the girls to the aquarium. It should be a fun day :).

Until Wednesday...

I love being a mommy..

I never rocked the girls to sleep. Well I shouldn't say 'never'. There was the occasional time where I would hold one and rock or daddy would. When they were little, they fell asleep with a bottle and we would just them in bed. As they got older, we gave them bottles, baths, books and bed. We put them in bed awake and they would lay down and go to sleep. They never needed to be rocked. Last night, they didn't need to be rocked either but I'm not sure if it's the sudden awareness that they are going to be a year old next week or just the fact that I'm not having any more babies, that I just felt the need to rock them. Together.

Having multiples is hard. Everyone knows this. For me, I get up and change two diapers, make 2 bottles, dress two babies and get them ready for breakfast. Make double the baby food and feed them. After breakfast, one baby wants to be read to and the other baby wants to get into everything. Mommy wants to go to the bathroom, wash her face, brush her teeth, I have to transport two babies into the bathroom with me (since I'm not allowed out of their radar) and try to keep them out of everything while I do it. Two babies make double the mess. You should see the room when they are done.

Going out with them by myself is fun but it isn't. Maybe when they walk, it will be more fun.

Snuggle times. Double the hugs, right? Not when they want mommy to themselves. It ends up being a huge fight over who sits on mommys lap.

Anyway, it's been almost a year and I look back on things that I didn't get to do that I would of done with one baby. Like rock my baby to sleep or sit and cuddle with my baby and enjoy bunches of one on one. Then, I remember that I didn't get to raise one little baby for a year, I got to raise two. I got double the love, double the kisses, double the memories. I have memories for each of them. Katie, we went to the zoo, and you loved the big kitties. You just had to keep staring for what seemed like forever. Karly, You got so excited when you saw the monkeys and the turtles, which is funny because I used to say you looked like a turtle when you were very small and we call you a monkey now because you make monkey noises and crawl around on your feet.

Four days from now, my sweet baby girls will be one. Last night, they didn't need to be rocked but I asked my husband if he would help me get them on my lap and they both lay there in the dark room, Karly with her thumb, Katie with her paci. They talked to each other, sang, and then went quiet. They enjoyed being rocked. Just the three of us for almost an hour. I watched them as they fell asleep and it was beautiful.

Katherine and Karly, I love being your mommy and although at times I cried through the hard times, I've loved every single moment of your first year and look foward to many, many more.

Pictures and stuff..

Karly took some steps today!!! We went to the park and she took 3 steps. I am thrilled!!!!!

Katie has a tooth! Finally! I didn't know if they were ever going to come in or not and she's doing well. A little cranky but well.

Today I found out that the cribs we bought, put together and had our babies sleep in for the last 11 months, were recalled due to suffocation issues. Yes, the crib can break apart and cause death. An 8-month old died in Texas and it's hard to think what could of happened and Thank God my girls are okay but I keep thinking of the poor family who bought this crib in the same faith we did and now their baby is gone.

We took them apart and are taking them back. The girls are now sleeping in pack n plays. If they do okay, we aren't planning on buying them another crib. We plan on switching to toddler beds when they start walking really well. When they understand mommy says stay in bed (hahahahahahahahahahahaha) or when I feel it's time to start.

The pictures below are just of Katie. Karly was cranky today and opted out of the photo taking. Hopefully I will lots of cute ones tomorrow so we will have lots to post. Katie was playing in the pool and there is water but just a tiny bit. Daddy put a little rip in it so the middle tube deflated and I wasn't going to fill up a pool I have to replace tomorrow. My little lady bug.....

Pictures (new post below)

Today seems to be better...

Yesterday was a day from hell. Hubby and I kept fighting while we were out, then I get home and there is a message for me from someone that I had let an outstanding bill go for 9 years and now they wanted the money. 2 hours on the phone and 1,154.49 later, I have it taken care of. Can you believe they wanted me to pay over 5,000$$ for fees!!! I didn't even know about it. Problem: Just young and stupid. Then ppl at work were getting on my nerves and by the end of the day, I felt as if I didn't have a friend in the world. But then there are my kids. I held them tight, played with them, gave them lots of kisses and then when they went to bed, I cried myself to sleep. BUT that was yesterday. It's over.

Today I took Karly for her bloodwork. I was worried so much that I felt sick but you know what? It went just fine. She cried but then again so do I when I get bloodwork done haha. It's over and I'm sure it will come back fine. She's just a skinny kid. Although she shouldn't be losing weight. So hopefully she'll of gained at our 1 year check up. I don't have much else to report.

They are both standing up and Karly is trying to walk! I love it. I'm probably alone in this but I can't wait until they can walk. I'm really looking foward to it.

Dreams..

There once was a house. This house was 2 bedrooms. This house was made of concrete. There was no insulation, no dry wall, just concrete. It had little windows and it sat on a corner with a large yard and pretty trees in the yard. It housed a man struggling with his undiagnosed bi polar manic personality, a woman who married too young and was miserable, a 10 year old, an 8 year old, a 2 year old and an infant. They lived there for two years. In the winter, the older childrens blankets would freeze to the wall. Neither parent worked. In those two years, many bad things happened. The worst ones being:

• Man was in a horrible car accident that wasn't his fault, that left them car-less in the middle of the woods, later being sued by the person at fault and losing.
• 8 year old broke his arm at school. No medical insurance, more stress on man and woman
• The now 11 year old came home from school with high fever, parents sent her to bed with a prayer that all would be fine come morning (no money for dr bill)..Morning came much worse, man gone, woman alone with too many kids and no car/no phone...girls aunt (a nurse) came by and saw little girl (by the hand of God, she came). Little girl seriously ill. DX Ruptured appendix, near death.
• Babies get sick
• Man and Woman fight more.
• Woman comes out of house and yells for kids to pack their stuff, they are leaving.
• Man and Woman get divorce.

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The house still stands. I drove past it while on vacation. It's got a family living there again. It looks a little remodeled but the beautiful lawn is overgrown. I hate this house. I wish it would of burned to the ground. I never want to step foot in this house again.

Why am I posting this?

Last night I had a dream that I went back this house. The house was painful to walk through, the floors were covered with garbage from my past. Dogs that have died were running through the yard. A baby was in the living room in the swing. I didnt' know the babys name, or if it was a boy or a girl, but it was there smiling at me when I walked in. I hated being there. I walked into another room and my mom was sitting there on the couch. I asked her what she was doing and she didn't respond.

Thank goodness katies Cry woke me up. I didn't want to be there anymore but I couldn't get out.

Planning a birthday bash is hard work...

and I really even started yet.

So far, I've sent out the invites (sorry for the crappy photo)




And got the birthday outfits.




I still need to:

• Get decorations, utensils and plates/napkins
• Decide on menu
• Go grocery shopping
• Get party bag items
• Make Party bags
• Buy and wrap the gifts from my mom and dad
• Buy and wrap the gifts that are from us
• Order cakes

On Friday, the day before, we will get all the tables out, cleaned and ready then on Sat, we will decorate. Not sure when we will do the rest. I have three weeks but I can't do all the errands with the girls by myself and hubby only has Sat and Tuesdays to help. I think it will all go as planned, I'm just stressin' it.

Monday, I've decided to start my diet again. I see a bit of the weight creeping back slowly and we can't have that. My goal is to lose all this weight by next summer, but I'm going to make short 20lb goals until I make it. I've decided to take photos but not show anyone until after the weight is gone.

That is all that is on my mind right now, I'm sure I'll think of more later :)

Oh yeah, I forgot..on Tuesday (just passed) I turned 30. I kept complaining to my grandmother that I didn't want to be 30. I wanted to stay 29 and she reminded me of my dads cousin Anthony who, at 29, after complaining he didn't want to turn 30, was killed in a car accident before his birthday "so he will forever be 29". I never met him but it makes me sad. So I am very happy that I am 30, that I've gotten 30 years and that I have more time with my precious girls...even if I do feel old right now haha.

I need to get back on a diet..

It's almost 11 and I'm eating strawberry mini wheats.

Today we took the girls for a follow up and got some news.

Karly needs to have some bloodwork and see a GI doctor. She just isn't gaining any weight. Good thing our Pedi is a stick herself because she told me she wasn't worried and that Karly will probably just be a skinny kid but she just wants to rule out any health issues which will make me feel better.

Katie is in good health. She is now a little over 21 pounds and healthy.

I can't believe my girls are almost 1. How did that happen? When did it happen? Tonight I was working on their invites. I'm loving them so far. I'll wait a few weeks before ordering them and I promise to share them soon.

Back from vacation..

If you don't have facebook, you really should get it so I can add you and you can see the million vacation pictures :).

We had a great vacation. Traveling went great and we were way ahead of schedule. Girls were perfect and I couldn't of asked for better weather.

The first week went great. The second was a little chilly and rainy, then hot and humid.

The girls ended up getting throat infections and had 103 fevers. Not fun at all.

They are feeling better but have checkups tomorrow morning.

I really miss my family. It was great spending so much time with them.

The girls went swimming for the first time. I'm very happy they love the water just like their mommy.

We had an early birthday party for the girls because my mom wanted it. It went very nice and we had a windy but beautiful day.

Karly is starting to stand and tring to walk. Katie is getting better at pulling herself up and not falling as much. They are 11 months old as of Sunday.

I'm very tired but I'm going to start blogging every night :) before bed. I keep forgetting to write things down in their baby book, so I must write it somewhere.

A very rough night :(

I haven't updated on the girls in awhile so here are the stats:

Katherine Emily

20lbs 10oz

29 1/4 inches

She is perfectly healthy and a still in the 50% BUT she failed her hearing test for the second time in two months. The Dr. B said she has a little fluid in her ear and that may be why so we are going to go see an ENT when we get back from vacation. We KNOW she can hear. She babbles and responds to everything. She knows Katherine, Katie and Kate. Also, Katie-bug (our little ladybug). So we will see.

Karly Elizabeth

16lbs 12oz

28 1/2 inches

50-75% for length, 5% for weight

So she's long and skinny lol. The girls will hate her but love her at the same time :)

She is healthy, has 4 lovely teeth that she loves to bite mommy with. Her favorite thing to bite are my nips which drives me nuts and hurts like crazy.

The girls have a new past time. Fighting. I can't say I like the screaming and the hair pulling and the biting BUT they are sisters and I have two, so I know fighting will happen.

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I was talking to my mom until late last night. I was thinking of going to bed but then I realized that I had no idea where my engagement ring was. Where ever it was, it was with another expensive diamond ring I got for christmas two years ago. I looked everywhere and panicked, cried and then went to bed. It was about midnight. That's went everything went downhill.....

At 1:47, Karly wakes up screaming. I go to get her and she sees me and smiles. I don't know why she has to do this. At 3:30, she fell asleep after a long time rocking. I layed her in ther crib and she started crying. We put her in our bed and she played and talking and kicked hubby in the back. Hubby and I started getting snappy and I was getting emotional because I was tired. (Katie has been doing this for 2 weeks now so I guess it's only fair that Karly have a turn, right?)

Finally I give up around 4:30 and put her in her crib. She cried for about 10 minutes and went to sleep. I fell asleep but it wasn't the best because I kept thinking of my missing rings. Then Katie started crying. Donald got up and I asked him to get her a bottle because I knew that would help her go to sleep. I'm not for using bottles to go to sleep but I needed something. When she saw the bottle she started crying for it which woke up Karly. So we got Karly a bottle and around 530 I guess I eventually passed out. I just remember having to go to the bathroom and not being able to pry my eyes open.

In my dream, I dreamed about my rings. The girls woke up at 8 and I was not ready to get up. From somewhere, I remembered my dream and went to search in that spot and they were there. Since AF has arrived my fingers have been swollen so I must of put them on and then during the night, pulled them off and put them on the accent shelf above the bed carelessly and they fell behind the bed. Donald moved the bed and got them out. They are now tucked away in the jewelry box. I am so exhausted right now and after grocery shopping, the girls are going down for a nap and I'm going to bed.

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Tina

Bad blogger..

Katie and Karly 2 weeks old.

Karly and Katie 2 months old.

Katie and Karly 10 months old.

Last day in old carseats.

See new carseats in header on top of blog :)

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Life has been pretty busy. Lots of things going on. In 1 week, I'm going home!! For 2 whole weeks! I am pretty darn excited.

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The girls turned 10 months last week. 10 months! Where the heck did the time go? The last day of vacation they will turn 11 months!

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I have lost 14 pounds :). I'm pretty darn excited about it. 14 pounds in one month. Slow and steady? I haven't tried to lose a lot, I've just been watching what I eat and trying to work out but on days like today, I didn't and there are days like yesterday where I work out and then do 3 hours of yard work.

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I've been a pretty bad blog reader too :(. I am planning on catching up tonight. I hope everyone is well.

A beautiful Summer, er, Spring day :)

Today we had a fantastic family day.

We started off at the Jersey Shore Outlets. We bought the girls all new jammies, for the warmer weather, mommy got a new pair of sneakers (sketchers..very cute) and a bunch of new shirts (a size too small, of course) and daddy got a new pair of sneakers and mommy talked him into a pair of flipflops :).

Then while we were eating lunch, I had a nice chicken cobb salad :) Yummmmm, we started talking about beaches and how it's a nice beach day. So, I went to the information desk, got directions to the nearest nice beach (only 15 minutes away!) so we decided to do it.

We got there, found parking and walked to the beach with the girls. We held them instead of using the stroller. (how would a stroller work on the sand anyway?) We sat down in the sand the sat the girls in it. They loved it. We walked to the water and it was sooo cold but like bad parents, we dipped their feet in too. I can tell you, they got very P-Oed. So we brought them back to the beach and sat in the sand for awhile until we knew we had to head back. The mall is a little over an hour away from us and then the drive to the beach so we knew we had a drive ahead.

Anyway, it was a wonderful family day and made me look forward to so many more.

A beautiful weekend!

6:00 AM is the time that 2 girls decided to get up. I know, I know. I've been lucky they like to sleep til 7. I like to also remember the days they slept until 10 with mommy. Those days are gone and in it's place are two adorable, happy, silly little girls. They love to laugh and have a great time together. They do get into fights but don't all sisters?

8:15 AM is when I put them down for their naps. I walked in a little while later because I wasn't hearing much sleeping. What I found, were two silly girls, standing up in their cribs, laughing a playing with each other. They are now sound asleep.

9:00 AM is when I went into the bathroom and stepped on the scale while holding my breath. Everytime I stand on the scale, I go over what I ate the day before. Last night, Donald made me an ice cream cone with friendlys vanilla and fudge ice cream. It was soo good. I haven't had junk food in over a week. Everyday it's Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner. Nothing in between. I don't crave anything in between (thanks phentermine) so I'm perfectly happy. Anyway, where was I, oh yeah..holding my breath and standing on the scale...

Holy Crap!! 8 pounds! I've lost 8 pounds. 8 pounds!! In 9 days, I've shed 8 pounds. It has to be okay because I'm eating normal (just no snacking). I have a bowl of cereal, something for lunch, then a regular dinner consisting of meats, veggies and starches. I haven't had a low calorie anything and the other day I had Arbys for lunch, yesterday it was a slice of pizza, not two like I usually have, but Pizza!

Original Goal = 43 pounds
New Goal = 35 pounds

Feeling very good.

I do, however, still feel like I'm cheating a bit. But oh well, sometimes ppl need help, right?

I got a haircut!

1st picture is the before, 2nd the after :).

I'm so happy I finally did it. She didn't take as much off as I had originally wanted but she said that my hair had no damage and if she fixed what I didn't like about it, would I reconsider it. Well, you can't tell someone they have beautiful, soft, shiny hair then ask if you can fix it and have them say No, now can you. So I told her, if you can make it look good, I'll keep the length but I did ask her to trim it up a bit. So she did and I love it. Best $50 bucks ever spent..maybe lol.


Okay enough about that.

Things have been going well just very very busy. I don't know what I do with all my time. Lets visit various parts of my life:

• Katherine. My little Katie has learned to crawl!! Shes also been sick so she hasn't been in the mood to do much of it. I took her to the dr this morning and they told me she has a virus. Last night she had a temp of 103 and yesterday is was 100.9-101.0. She is coughing/sneezing and seems to just feel yucky.
• Karly. My little punkin head. She is as crazy as ever. She still loves to laugh and always has that beautiful smile on her face. She is learning to pull herself up and walk holding on to stuff. She is always ahead of herself and growing way to fast.
• They are both trying new foods. I've started them on real solids starting with boiled vegetables (carrots and peas), bananas and cheerios. They also get yobaby yogurt and love it. They are really getting the hang of putting stuff in their mouth using their fingers.
• Weight issues...
• A huge cyst...

I've been trying to lose weight for the past few months and nothing has come of it. I don't lose anything. No matter what workout I do or if I eat or don't eat nothing. Then I started eating all the time. Not sure why it started but it did. But I wasn't eating for no reason, I always felt like I was starving. Like I hadn't eaten anything. My stomach would feel like it was growling and if I didn't eat something it would hurt. I asked the dr and he gave my Phentermine. I told him I didn't want a diet pill and he said it wasn't. He said it controls the part of the brain that wants to eat. Well I can tell you, it works. I don't feel the need to eat at all. I think it may be a stronger dose than I need but I make myself eat 3 times a day. I have a small breakfast, lunch and a healthy dinner. It's only been 3 days but I've already lost a pound. I feel like I'm cheating. Like I'm not earning the weight loss. I do need to use this time to learn to eat healthy. I can only take it for a month and that's it. It's not intended for long term use and it's a controlled substance and I usually prefer to stay away from those but I'm hoping that it will give me a boost in the right direction and I'll be able to soar with the weight loss goals at the end of the 30 days.

The cyst. There is a very large cyst in my pelvis. I guess it is abnormally large and is causing all the pain I've been feeling. I have a meeting with a dr this week to tell me what needs to be done about it. I'm so worried about surgery. This week the pain is almost unbearable in my back.

Motherhood...

I love being a mom. I knew I'd love being a mom but I love it even more than I ever imagined. I love walking into their room and seeing them smile at me. I love when I hear them saying "Mama" even if they don't *really* mean it yet. I love when they wake up in the middle of the night, okay so I don't exactly *love* waking up at 1am, reaching for me and when I pick them up the bury their faces in my neck and go back go sleep. I love the giggles, the smiles and hugs.

Of course, there are things I don't enjoy. The fighting they do, the tantrums. The screaming at bedtime. What I didn't consider is the fact that somehow a mother needs to take time to make sure she takes care of herself. I started out thinking that all I needed to do what to take care of them, keep them fed and happy. Not true.

Three weeks ago I started having pain. I ignored the pain. Wednesday it became so severe I had to go to the doctors and felt I was on the verge of going insane. My doctor said he thinks its my intestines. That I have a possible infection and treated it but sent me to have an u/s to make sure it's nothing else. I haven' taken the time to find another Gyno, so now I need to find one because today, at the u/s, they found an few items that need to be examined by a gyno. I still have fluid around my ovary, I still have pcos and I have what looks like another large cyst but my uterus is still very large and they couldn't get a good look at it. I am going for a CT scan in, oh crap, 2 minutes. I'm hoping it goes well and the radiololgist said that whatever it is probably benign but with a family history of uterine cancer, I'm alway nervous. Okay 1 minute...

I'm also dehydrated most of the time. I can never remember to drink something and I am doing so badly at my weight loss goal :(.

I've got to find an equal balance between kids and self. Any suggestions?

A rainy afternoon..

Isn't spring wonderful? Yes, it does rain a lot but it's such a renewing process. I love the spring. It is my favorite season.

Baby Girls:
They girls are doing great. Karly is crawling around getting into everything, loves to throw tantrums but can really turn on the smiles and giggles when needed. There must be some 8 month wakeful period that nobody told me about because she doesn't want to sleep. Katie is doing great as well. She is starting to babble a lot. Doesn't want to crawl yet but loves to stand. She's even starting to pull herself up but I don't think she likes falling (Karly doesn't mind it, she just cries for a minute then does it again) and that holds her back I think. She loves playing with her toys and is just so sweet. She doesn't cry much. Usually when Karly is bothering her or gets her toy taken away or when she sees her bottle in the warmer.

Work:
I've decided to go back full time in the fall. I think I'm going back to my own classroom instead on assisting but I'm not sure yet. Either one is fine by me but I will only work the late hours if it's in my own classroom. If I'm an assistant, I want earlier hours.
What am I doing for childcare you may wonder? Well these were my options:

1. My Center I work for. It would be 3/4 my salary but they would be with me all the time. I could see them at break time and any other time I had a minute.
2. The Center around the corner from my house. It's 1/2 my salary, close to home and my husbands job so he would be picking them and they wouldn't have to go all day. If one of them gets sick or hurt, my MIL could go and check on them. It is literally a 2 minute walk.
3. My MIL. My husband would take care of them before he went to work and after. They'd be with her about 4-7 hours/day. DH works 6 shorter days instead of 5 long days, so it would be great AND she doesn't want to get paid so its $0 from my paycheck.

Which one did I choose? Option 3. Why?

1. Too much.
2. Way to dirty. I couldn't see what person would send their child there. I felt like I needed a shower when I left.
3. Well, best option. At least for this year.

I hear babies crying.

Just photos

Have been on much lately. Don't have much to share..do have some drama but I have a stinkin' headache that has made me change my mind about blogging tonight so I'll try to update over the weekend. Here's some pics of the girlies :)

Dinner at Cubbys BBQ

Sleeping at Cubbys BBQ

Karly dressed for St. Pats Day

Karly had too much fun on St. Pats Day :)

(yes I know there are a lot of no-nos in her crib but she loves them)

Katie wanting nothing to do with the camera

This is what one of her tantrums looks like..you can imagine the noise..

This is what happens a few minutes later..

Take care :)

Video..

It's army crawling but she's working on it. Katie started tonight but when you look at her she cries for you to pick her up. I have to learn to look out of the corner of my eye lol.

Quick update..

Start: 43 lb goal...

3/14/09: 38 to go.

Not much, but it's something. I need need need to add more physical activity but I never seem to have enough time and when I do, I'm tired.

Girls are 8 months old today. Katie is on antibiotics for a double ear infection, pink eye in both eyes and a yucky cold that we've started using the nebulizer for. I didn't even know she was sick. I brought her in for the obvious pink eye and that was the dx.

Karly is doing great. Crawling around everywhere. Getting into everything. She's so cute :).

I haven't gotten to anyones blog in a week or two so I hope all is well in blog land. I'm hoping to catch up tomorrow :)

Okay...

I haven't blogged in a week but it seems longer.

1. My computer had to be erased..along with all my photos. :( I'm heartbroken because I had uploaded to the computer and deleted my camera card. All gone :(

2. My diet is still there but it's not going anywhere. I'm still where I was. How is that possible?

3. For my job, I need continuing education credits. This takes place on Saturdays. I'm finished, right after I read this book and take a test.

4. My girls are getting oh so big. Their well visit is next wednesday. I can't wait to see how big they are getting.

5. Karly is crawling! Katie was trying but has stopped. I had to move Karlys mattress down because she pulls herself up now.

6. There is someone in my life that is treating me like I'm a moron and this person has been in my life forever so I'm not sure how to address it. It's really pissing me off and I'd like to put this person in her place but I'm not going to.

Ugh..

Today I tried so hard..I did :)

Breakfast: Raisin Bran/fat free milk
Lunch: WW multi grain with peanut butter
Dinner: salad, Salmon w/broccoli and some potatoes
but:
I had some cheesecake from the cheesecake factory. One of my kids gave me a GC 2 years ago and I never used it so we did tonight. It was yummy.

So I guess tomorrow is another day. We are staying home so I'm guessing there won't be any disruptions to my diet. I am making strawberry wheat pancakes in the morning. Probably something small for lunch and a nice dinner. j

Baby news:
Katie crawls...well army crawling but she's moving everywhere which means I have two mobile babies. How exciting!

Okay so it's been a few days..

Tracy...I want to read your blog :( I miss the wonder twins...

Dearest Katherine Emily,

You are such a beautiful child. You feel my heart with so much love. You are so quiet and peaceful. Daddy wants you to say "Dada" so bad. I've heard you say "Mama" once, but I'm okay with that. Today, you almost fell off the bed. You became mobile in a matter of moments :). Today I also learned that you don't like mommy leaving the room without and that I'm not allowed to blowdry my hair unless I'm holding you. You are so beautiful and I love you so much.

Dearest Karly Elizabeth,

You are one silly baby. You love to laugh, act goofy and wiggle everywhere. You say all kinds of stuff and you love to "sing". By sing, I mean scream at the top of your lungs and laugh. People think you are crying but we have to say "No, she's just singing". They actually have to look at you to make sure. You haven't been feeling yourself though. You are getting your second bottom tooth and it's making you very cranky. I love you though. You are the cutest thing ever.

Diet News:

Okay so exercising is not going well BUT I have been getting some walking in. I walked around walmart (fast, not slow) and I do some dancing with the kids in class and I went for a walk to the park today with the girls. I loved it. Weigh in is on tuesday so we'll see what happens..anyway here's what I had today

Breakfast: raisin bran, fat free milk

Snack: peanuts

Lunch: chinese food (ick...not good) pork friend rice

Snack: peanuts

Dinner: White Castle (double ick) but I only had 3 burgers and like 4 fries ;)

Snack: 1 powdered doughnut and milk (I know I know)

so I guess it's safe to say that I totally blew my diet today. If it makes you feel better, I feel kind of like throwing up. 2 weeks without crap can make a tummy sensitive to it :).

Night all :)

hi

Wonder Twins: Tracy...I can't read your blog! Invite please? Tinamarie623@msn.com.

Diet:
Breakfast: Farina (cream of wheat) Milk/toast
lunch: half a tuna sandwich/peanuts/diet dr pepper
dinner: Chicken soup, chicken breast, milk
snacks: peanuts, apple and lollipop :)
liquids: milk, water, half a diet dr pepper

Oops!

I totally forgot to post sunday and monday night :).

Diet news:

I weighed myself this morning to find out I am -2 pounds now. I was pretty happy with that. I don't get to excited until it's more than 5 pounds because it always goes up and down. I really really really want the weather to warm up a bit so I can go walking. I used to walk 2 miles everymorning and I miss that. They just built this really nice walking/running track down the hill from my house by the waterfront and I can't wait to go wear it out. I don't remember what I ate on sunday but here's what i had yesterday.

Breakfast: cheerios/banana (wow no eggs or oatmeal? lol)

Lunch: Smart ones Lasagna

Dinner: Egg noodles and meatloaf with red sauce

Snacks: Peanuts, peanuts and peanuts. Oh I also had a piece of v day choc and some fruit snacks :)

Liquids: Water, Milk

Girlie news:

Karly has her second tooth!! Katie isn't even teething :(. Her daddy didn't get teeth until he was 11 months old so I'm guessing she's going to be the same. Karly is becoming more mobile and is getting into everything! You really can't turn your back on her for a second.

A long but fun day :)

My dad started earlier than normal ;).

I got up at 6, got dressed and left the house. I skipped the shower. Didn't feel it necessary. Picked up my friend at 7, stopped for coffee and breakfast sandwiches and headed to the hotel. We arrived in West Orange at a great time, signed in and found our co-workers and got seats. From 8-12, we listened to two men talk about how to deal with children that like to get in trouble :). It was a seminar about Discipline. I have to complete 8 hours of seminars by April 30th. I did 4 today, 4 to go. I enjoy them. I love learning new techniques but I'm not a head teacher now, so I'll store the info, do what I can and go with it.

Once I dropped my friend off, I headed home where I got to see my girls for the first time today. Katie was getting her diaper changed and arched her back so she could look at me. I got the biggest smile. Daddy had put karly in her crib because she was inconsolable. I walked in and got the biggest smile before she started crying. I picked her up and hugged her and all the tears went away. Best. Feeling. Ever. She missed me. She knew I was gone and she missed me.

After my shower, we got ready and headed out for the day. We went to Sams Club to restock up on diapers and wipes and some other stuff we didn't need. After leaving Sams, we went to Target then to Jose Tejas to eat. I love tex mex. MMMM...

We made a run to babies r us, spent time with the grandparents and put the girls in bed. Now I'm sitting alone, with everyone sleeping and it's nice. I had a great day.

Dieting news:
Breakfast: English muffin with ham egg cheese/coffee
Lunch: turkey sandwich/pickle/water
Dinner: Burros (chicken wrapped in a tortilla w/enchilda sauce on top) yum o and black beans/ice tea unsweetened
snacks: 100 calorie pack of peanut butter cookies

Day 5..

I can't believe it's day 5 of my diet. I forgot to weigh myself, which is good because I'd like to wait until Monday to weigh in. Today was a little rough with getting the girls to bed but I need to head to bed early. I have a seminar to attend at 8 am and that means I'll be missing my morning routine with my girls. I haven't done that ever.

The Diet:
Breakfast: Egg Sandwich (homemade)
Lunch: Fish sticks..it was all I had
Dinner: Breaded chicken, spaghetti
Snacks: 100 calorie popcorn, fruit snacks (lol)
Drinks: Orange juice, water, fat free milk.

Night all :)

OH my hubby has started to blog. It's called "notes from a daddy" its www.notesfromadaddy.blogspot.com

Another day...

Today was a little rough. I think it's the meds. I got up tired. I let the girls fuss themselves back to sleep and didn't get up with them at all. That makes me sad. I forced myself to do a few things, start some laundry and feed the girls. After everyone ate, Karly was getting sleepy so I put her in my bed and cuddled with her. Donald brought Katie in a few minutes later and in a few moments, we were all asleep. That was at 10:30. At 1:30, I woke up to a pair of beautiful eyes staring at me. Totally awake. I think she knew mommy just needed to sleep. Katis is a such a good baby. Anyway, I got up fed them bottles, ate lunch and go ready for work. Ended up leaving work early because I just couldn't do it. Now I'm sitting with my feet up trying to plan the girls' first birthday party.

Diet Info
Breakfast: oatmeal/wheat toast/fat free milk
lunch: Half a turkey sandwich on rye, a side of fish..just what I had laying around
Dinner: Vegetable soup/water
Snacks: gummy candy, cupcake (It was one of kids bday parties today. I only ate half)
Liquids: Milk, water

Loooong day that ended with oreos...

and fat free milk :(.

I woke up this morning at 630 to get Karly out of her crib. She's been sleeping through the night for the last 5 months but lately (since she got her tooth) she wants mommy cuddle time at midnight, 3 etc... When I pick her up, I get a big smile and in goes the thumb as she curls into me and goes back to sleep. How do you say no to that?! So last night, I really started feeling bad. They both woke up repeatedly but I didn't get up with them. They fussed themselves back to sleep but I don't want them thinking that I won't come to them if they need me..anyway that's for another day.

So I get up at 630, pick up Karly and crawl back into bed because I wasn't feeling well. Around 7, Katie woke up and I went to go get bottles. We always do morning bottles in bed with cartoons on. I love it. So I go to get bottles and realize there are none made. There is no milk made. There are no clean bottles?! Donald has been getting the morning bottles ready the night before for awhile and usually I wash the bottles before I go to bed but it completely slipped my mind. So I had to scrub up some bottles (girls are now crying) and make some milk (How I wish I could of breast fed). I give them their bottles.

Then we had to get ready for our well visits. We arrived at 9 or a few minutes after. We waited for almost an hour! It was insane. We kept them as calm as we could and Thank God I have a friend that works in the drs office because she bumped us up. I didn't ask, but she said she felt bad because I have two babies to keep happy in the waiting room. So we go back and Katie weighs 19 lbs and Karly weighs 15.4 lbs. Right before the dr comes in, Katie starts throwing her tantrum. Shes crying, screaming and so on. We lay her down to get her shot, she's already crying and then she starts screaming. Karly cried for about 5 seconds, bless her little heart.

So we leave the office. Katie crying, Karly happy. We decide to get something to eat. We go to t he diner, we feed the babies and ourselves and start talking about how neither of us feel well and it's wearing us down. I make us an appointment. It's at 1. Then I remembered that we are out of formula at home. We drive to shop rite, buy some formula ($200 worth that will last us 2 weeks....how do they sleep at night?) Then head to our drs appointment. We give them bottles at the drs and they stay calm. After an hour and half we get called back. Donald has a throat infection, I have an infection in my chest. We are both on antibiotics.

I get home at 2, we unload the car, I go upstairs, drink some juice and get ready for work. Work until 6, pharmacy then home. Feed babies, feed myself then snuggle with babies while they drink their last bottle, jammies then bed. I wash all the bottles, make enough bottles for tomorrow and the next morning, down 4 oreaos and now I'm blogging with a bottle of water.
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Diet today--
Breakfast was Ham, Egg and Cheese Wrap w/ potatoes
Lunch was skipped
Dinner was a homemade hamburger w/soup
Snacks 4 oreas, peanuts
Drinks unsweetened ice tea, water and OJ

Day 2 -1, 42lbs to go :)

I know it's just water weight and my weight fluctuates so much but I'll take it :)

For breakfast I had a bowl of oatmeal and since I had to brown sugar, I had to use 2 teaspoons of regular sugar w/ a little fat free milk. If anyone knows a yummy way to eat oatmeal without sugar, let me know :). I also had 2 slices of wheat toast with smart balance butter and a glass of fat free milk.

For lunch, I had a cobb salad..yum-o and a side of fish..ick, and a glass of water. Kind of a "throw whatever together" lunch.

For dinner I had London Broil (one of the only few red meats I'll eat) string beans and mac n cheese (!). Everything in moderation ;).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dh and I are both sick :( but I managed to do 15 minutes of Cardio and some target ab stuff. I had to stop the cardio because my chest was burning and I couldn't breathe ( I have asthma and a chest cold). I'll try to stick to 15 minutes and up it as I feel better.

Then I took a walk to the Library with the girls and then I walked to his work, then home. a good hour of walking. So I think I got in enough physcial activity. Top it off, I went to work and I work with small children so there's not much sitting around there.

Day 1 -0

Okay, so obviously no weight loss today :). I'm set to lose 43 pounds.

Today, for breakfast I had 2 eggs, wheat toast, and a glass of fat free milk.
Lunch was mexican. It was rice, pinto beans, pork, corn/onion salsa, cheese and a touch of sour cream.
Dinner was baked chicken, vegetables and potatoes.
Snacks were an apple and a 100 calorie pack of peanut butter cookie crisps.
To drink was crystal light, water and milk.

I need to drink more water. That I know. We took a walk (that is my pitiful effort for exercise today). Will try to pump it up tomorrow.

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In other news:
Today was an okay day. All four of us have a cold, neither baby is sleeping through the night and Karly wanted to be held from 4 am on, which is why my head hurt so bad today. Lack of sleep + holding baby and tense muscles from it = one killer headache.

Girls are doing so well. It's amazing to watch them interact with each other, although it mainly consist of knocking each other out of the way to get to the nearest toy, pulling each other down and taking toys from each other. Other than that, they are doing well lol. Tonight, Karly was just swimming all over the tub. I loved it. Katie sat in her corner of the tub getting splashed and kicked but she didn't care. She had her rubber frog ;).

1 day to go...

Remember when life was simple :)

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Okay so I woke up this morning +1 which means I need to lose 43 pounds starting Monday. I know it's alot of water weight. I hate water weight. How else would I gain a whole pound in 1 day?!

So tomorrow morning I will weigh myself and go from there. Who knows, maybe it will be 44 pounds tomorrow :(. Then I plan to weigh myself every monday. (I'm a crazy scale person. I weigh myself several times a day)

Today I had very very very low self esteem. I felt so bad about myself. I felt ugly (probably because I woke up with 4 pimples on my chin). Fat fat fat!! I felt awful about myself and while we were walking around the mall my pants and undies kept falling, so I had to keep pulling them up. How embarrassing. Hubby noticed something not right with my mood but what do I say. "Oh, I'm just ugly and fat and my clothes are falling?" I said nothing.

Today we spent the day out. For breakfast, I made up eggs, a slice of ham and toast w/ a cheese slice. (I need to switch to wheat bread). For lunch, like I said we went to Cracker Barrel and I had Chicken fried chicken, pinto beans, carrots and mashed Ps. BUT I didn't finish anything but the carrots :D! I purposely had the woman take my plate before I could down the whole thing but boy was it YUMMY! For dinner, I had a plate of spaghetti.

Okay I'm off to bed. I have the day off tomorrow and we are staying home :). Yay!

Happy Valentines Day!

Today was Valentines Day and we enjoyed it as a family, then as a couple. We went to PF Changs as a family of 4. I have to say, that they did great. We made early reservations as not to disturb the romantic diners later. The girls were being very good. A woman, oh about 30, came over and said "I just want you to know, everyone is talking about you". I thought it was going to be something bad like "I can't believe she brought her kids here" or something to that effect. Instead it was "They are talking about how beautiful and well behaved your babies are". Wow! I felt so proud I almost cried. Cried! Of course I think they are great but to hear it is wonderful. After dinner, we came home, played with the girls for a little while, bathed them and put them in jammies. After their bottle we put them in bed and went out as a couple. We went to Barnes and Noble, had some desert, bought a book (for the girls, of course) and a magazine (for parenting lol) and took a drive. It was a very nice Valentines Day.

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Okay so I stepped on the scale..I want to lose 42 pounds. Apparently, I've gained 2 more pounds :(. Ugh.

Okay so today I had 3 Shredded Wheat buscuits. (If you don't know, it kind of looks like a small bale of hay) in Fat Free milk for breakfast. For lunch, I had a ham and cheddar on wheat with a small Dr. Pepper..bad I know. I had 2 pieces of chocolate (remember it's Valentines Day) and for dinner I had 2 bites, er sips, of egg drop soup (ick), 2 lettuce wraps (yum-o) and beef and broccoli and a tiny shot glass with carrot cake in it. Oh and 3 blackberry jasmine ice teas (very yum-0). Then for desert (hey, it's Valentines Day lol) I had a small green tea Frap and a piece of cheesecake. Like I said, today doesn't count, It's Valentines Day :).

But we'll see what tomorrow brings :) because it's family day out and we are going to...Cracker Barrel! I love that resturant and I always get chicken fried steak with mashed potatoes and corn. I chose a really bad weekend to start this diet thing.

I do have a history of weight loss. I lose it really easy but gain it back very easily. The dr said PCOS has some to blame, not watching what I eat and exercising is to blame as well. It seems I always get on this kick to lose the weight, I lose 30-40 pounds then fall off the wagon and it slowly comes back on. To do my final IVF, I lost 30 pounds, got pregnant, gained 40, lost 40 and have gained 20 pounds back in 5 months. 20 pounds in 5 months!!! It's my fault I know. Life was so busy trying to get used to twins that I let myself go. My husband doesn't care how much weight I gain (sadly) but I do.

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I have 3.5 months...

To lose this weight!

30-40 pounds lol...NOT. Okay so I have all the time to lose those pounds but I want to start losing some of this weight before vacation.

Every morning, the girls wake up at 730. I give them a bottle, they get dressed then we are ready for the day. I told my dh that since I know when they are going to get up, I should get up an hour and a half earlier and go walking. He said he didn't think I would do it. I told my friend and she laughed and said sleep is more important. Not much encouragement there. Needless to say, it never happened.

This morning, I decided my day while the girls were eating. Bottles, clothes and then they could play in the room while I exercised on my home equipment. I go to the bottle fridge upstairs and realized it wasn't working because there was ice over the blower thingy so I spent the next three hours defrosting (didn't think of the blow dryer until hour 3!), juggling laundry, taking care of babies and trying to clean the living room, bathroom and kitchen only to have an even bigger cleanup around the fridge. Not to mention I still had to get shower and get ready for work!

So..I'd like to say that Monday morning, I am going on a diet (as best as I can lol) and I am working out. I'm going to my home equipment and I'm going on those walks. Why not? I usually wake up early anyway. Why not get up and at 'em huh? So, this is what I'm going to do. I am also going to blog daily. What I eat, what exercise I do and so on. Lets go me, lets go!

Babies are doing beautifully! Karly has her first tooth coming in and today they've started lifting their hands when they want me to pick them up. I love them sooo much. Being a mommy is the greatest gift in the world.

It's been a long time :)

It's been awhile since I've updated.

Everything is going great. Both girls are starting to sit up really good on their own. It's so much easier to be able to sit them down and be able to do somethings knowing that they can sit and play with their toys. I still have to put a pillow behind them in case they fall and bump their heads. That has happened a lot. They both scream for a second then get over it but I hate that they hit their heads. When I leave Karly sitting up, she kind of leans over to the side and lets her body roll so she's on her belly, then she wiggles herself wherever she wants to go. It's too cute. Katie likes to either sit and play or stand holding your hands. She has no interest in learning to move around on her own and I think she's going to go straight to walking even though I'd rather crawl a bit first. Give me a heads up on how quick and nosy they are going to be lol.

Their personalities are so different. Katie is very quiet, strong and so smart. She loves watching people, watch what they do, then she imitates it correctly. I know that every baby probably does it the same way but these are my babies and I think it's amazing :). She loves to eat..solids and bottles. She can hold her own bottle now and that helps. We still aren't sleeping through the night in her own bed. She wakes up anywhere between 12-4 to get in bed with us. Depending on how many times I want to get out of bed, is when she gets put in bed with us. Once there she sleeps peacefully all night. She also has a knack for taking all of the toys and putting them away from Karlys reach. Its funny actually.

Karly is hysterical. She laughs all the time. Says "mama" "Dada" "Gaga" "Baba" and is always saying "mmmmmmmmmm". She is sooo loud. She giggles up a storm. She moves everywhere. You have to watch her because she doesn't stay in one place to long. She gets into everything she can reach. She sleeps through the night. 830 to 730. It's wonderful. Today, she was in bed with me and I was giving her a bottle and we both fell asleep and slept until 10. She's a wiggle worm and soo skinny. She still has awful reflux and shes' going to the dr tomorrow to see what we are going to do about it.

Both girls are doing so beautifully and we are so in love with them.

Life is okay. I'm worried about money being that I only work part time. I miss the days when we were carefree with our money. I worry about our savings and bills although everything seems to be okay. I want to continue working part time at least until september and then re-evaluate things. I want to enroll the girls in sept '10 into the toddler program at the LC I work at.

God Bless :)

6 months old :)

We had 6 month photos taken today and if I wasn't already completely in love with my girls and already think they were the most beautiful little girls....well...

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted"

It seems like last year around this time I was sitting here crying over my cousin Billy, who was 22 and died in a motorcycle accident. This morning, I get a call from my cousins mom that my uncle Jr, 55, died this morning around 4:30. I am heartbroken. I'm am hurting so bad right now. My uncle is gone. Why? My Grandpa, My Uncle and My Grandma were the MOST important people in my life growing up. Without their love and guidance, who knows what I'd be doing today. My grandpa died in 2001 and now my uncle is gone. I called family but they are hurting as well so I'll just talk to my blog.

My favorite memories:

• He used to call me "Chipmunk" because of my chubby cheeks
• He taught me how to drive and didn't tell anyone or get mad when I wrecked his truck.
• He would always make me laugh.
• He was honest and good natured.
• He was very hardworking and would do anything for anybody.
• He was so kind.
• He had the greatest laugh. Even when he was told he had 2 months to live, he was laughing at my jokes.

He never had kids. He married my aunt Kathy when I was 15. I like to think he kind of treated me like his daughter. I wouldn't of minded. He was such an amazing guy.

I was trying to order flowers but what do you order? Flowers? I ended up sending a basket of flowers and memory tree for my aunt to plant wherever she wanted.

I'm so angry he's gone. It's not fair. When I went home in Oct, they said he had cancer in his heart and that he had 2 months. Somewhere I feared I'd never see him again but I think I'd talked myself into thinking that I'd see him next year. I wish I could go home and be with my family. My girls need me here. I can't fly in because the airport is 3 hours away from where I need to be and I'm afraid to drive through St. Louis by myself.

And if all of this is not enough...I think my daughter has the fifths disease. How in the heck did she get that? I think I need sleep. It's been a long day.

Happy New Year!

Katie trying to wrap up her sister.

Playing under the tree after all gifts were opened

Christmas Eve: Can we open just 1 mommy?
(they opened 1 :))

Posing in their "Our First Christmas" jammies on Christmas Eve

Those were some Christmas photos. I didn't think to take ANY! I am so upset. I didn't get any photos of anything. I was so wrapped up in the moment that it never occured to me to grab the camera. Oh well, at least the video camera was running the whole time.

Anyway, so it's that time again! Time for me to diet. The Holidays are over, I'm not longer pregnant so I need to get into shape. My small goal 20 pounds. I've gained 20 in the last few months, so that stinks. It's all in my belly and face. So my goal is 20 pounds. I've been looking into something to kick start the weight loss and I'm thinking of take a months worth of Slimquick. I'm not one for diet pills and I usually never take them (I hate taking anything...even tylenol) but I think if I get a jump start (the reviews were almost all positive) and I continue with cardio, I'll get a few pounds off and a positive attitude to get my but in gear.

I've also decided to start back up one of my favorite past times. My love for reading. I love historical romances. I like ones from the 1800's in London and I love the early 1900 westerns. Any suggestions? Anyway the first book I've decided to dig into is "P.S. I Love You" I saw the movie and cried through the whole freaking thing. I can't wait to read the book. I've been reading "Story Telling" by Tori Spelling for the last 2 months or so and I'm only half way through because I haven't made time for it but that's in the past. New Year, New Me :) .

The girls are doing great. Katie is starting to sit up, can hold her bottle for a short time, goes to sleep in a matter of seconds (by herself) and weighs a whopping 17.2 pounds! Karly says Mommmmmmmmma, Dada and makes a bunch of other sounds including "Ha ha" lol. At least thats what it sounds like. Lately, she cried at bedtime. Not sure why. She screams hysterically until we pick her up then she stops and smiles. She weighs 14.6 pounds! They are both getting so big!

Merry Christmas!

We have a wonderful first Christmas with the little ladies. They got way to many toys and had way to much fun! Too much fun you say? Nah, Never. Actually it was so hard to put them to bed Christmas night. We didn't succeed until 10 pm and that was only because mommy and daddy said "enough" put them in bed and shut the door. We let them cry it out. They cried for about 15 heartbreaking minutes, then they went to sleep and slept all night :).

We started the day with breakfast, then opened a few presents, then took a nap. While they were napping, the adults opened gifts. I got a new glider from Katie, a cute pair of eeyore pjs from Karly and a very pretty mommy necklace from my three loves. I got a pair of pjs from the in laws.

Today, Saturday, I had a very mommy/daughter day. It was fun but hard. We got up at 6:30, had a bottle of milk and hung around until daddy went to work. Then I put the girls down for a nap while I ate and cleaned a little. When they woke up, we headed to Burlington Coat to do a little shopping. You can get some baby stuff there for WAY cheaper than BRU. After that we went to daddys work then went grocery shopping for formula.

We came home, had some lunch. Yummy oatmeal with Applesauce and a bottle. Took a short nap, had a bath then got ready for a birthday part. I did the baths by myself! There are these cute little bath beds I call them. They are a slanted piece of mesh attached to legs and it holds them in a slanted position. I put both in the tub and put the babies in the tub, scrubbed them up and got them out. I was sweating by the time we made it to the bedroom. Karly hates lotion, so she screamed while I put in to. I got her dressed and happy and watched my little Katie. Naked as a jaybird laughing and playing with feet. So precious! Anyway I lotioned her up and got her dressed.

The party was so loud. Did I mention that I took my baby girls to an 8 and a 4 year olds birthday party? There were kids everywhere. Did I mention I took them by myself?! It was crazy. The other women helped me a little bit but they had their own kids to take care of. It was busy and loud and I was very tired. My friend let me put the girls to sleep in her bedroom where I crossed my fingers and begged Karly not to do a spitting up while laying down routine. She didn't thank goodness. Did I mention I won't be doing that again? :)

Well that was my day. I'm exhausted. Time for bed :). I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas!

Happy 5 Months babies!

Happy Holidays!

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