Monday, August 4, 2008

Can I say it?

I'm tired. So incredibly tired. Karly woke at 130 to eat and we put her back in bed at 330 asleep. At 335 Katie woke to eat and she is still up. I slept from 6-7 with her next to me but it wasn't really sleep because I was afraid I'd hurt her by dropping her or rolling on her. They are both awake now.

I'm still on antibiotics because I still have an infected incision. Sometimes I feel like I have the flu but the dr said it's the fever from the infection. It's really stressing my body out. A nurse comes daily and change the packing and bandage. Yesterday the bandage had turned green. She doesn't think it's the infection getting worse just a reaction from the solution and the infection. Lets hope so because she said if it gets worst I may have to be hospitalized.

Pumping is not working well at all. I pump maybe an oz a day. 1 oz for two babies. Def not enough. I'm feeling very discouraged and guilty because I can't give my babies what is best for them.

But I am enjoying being mommy to my little girls. Well they are in need of me, so I'm going..

1 comment:

Tracy said...

Hang in there, Mama. Everybody tells me it gets better. Hope you're feeling better soon.

Question, and only because I'm going to be embarking on this journey myself in a month or so, but can I ask why you are pumping and not feeding at the breast? Again, I am not being critical...I am truly curious. And want to know what I'm up against.

I've heard so many stories recently of MoMs that couldn't BF for some reason or another, and it's really got me worried that it won't work for us, as determined as I may be. So keep doing the best you can...I'm sure that either way, it will work out just fine.