My big big girl..

Today was Katies ear tube procedure. We got up at 5 and left the house at 5:30. Katie was in very good spirits.

We got her dressed in her gown and then we watched cartoons.

Such a beautiful baby..

They even had a toy room that she got to explore (while daddy played Wii).

Around 745, they brought her back. I got to go with her. I stayed with her until she fell asleep. I went back in the waiting room and cried. When they told me she was awake, I wanted to run to her. I walked in, looked around, saw my baby crying in the nurses arms, walked over and took her. I'd never felt so over protective before. She cried for a few minutes, then calmed down when we got her some juice and crackers.

In the end, all was okay. When we got home, she was laughing and playing like she had just taken a trip to the store. She had some blueberry pancakes that I had made and froze and some bananas then took a nap. I'm so happy it's over and done with.

Feeling scared..

My baby Kate has to have tubes put in her ears. Year after year, my class is filled with children that have them. I know it's not a big thing but I guess it feels like a much bigger deal when it's your baby. She has fluid in both ears. He also said that he thinks shes a bit delayed in speech and physical development.

I do understand. She babbles but she doesn't repeat words or sounds. She can't stand on her own and won't let go of what shes holding onto because she will lose her balance and fall. She will walk if you hold her hand but that's it.

So in two weeks she will have tubes put in. They said I could go in with her until she's asleep and then go back in when she's awake. All about 10 minutes. I'm still scared.

I'm trying to remember the positive. She'll sleep better. No more tossing and turning and whining in her sleep. She'll start saying words and even take a few steps. Her ears won't bother her anymore. Overall, she'll be a happier baby, although she is a very quiet happy baby now, she'll just be happier.

One year ago today..

One year ago today..I was ready to pop. I didn't go into labor though. We ended up having our scheduled c/s at 38 weeks and one day. Everyone told me how proud I should feel that I was able to carry them to term. All I wanted was them OUT.

We decided not to buy new cribs. Instead, we are using these portable cribs. They look like pack n plays but they are 20% smaller. We needed something for them to sleep when but they slept so well in them we just decided to keep them in there until we transition to toddler beds or they stop enjoying it. Whichever, we will do what needs to be done for their comfort. I was so heartbroken when they said the cribs would be destroyed.
You can see how small they are and yes, they sleep with blankets. They have since the day the were born. They won't sleep unless they have a blanket and they have two. One they lay on and one the sleep under. I think it's cute. Most of the time it ends up a big ball by their feet but they need to fall asleep.

Today was my husbands 38th birthday. We woke him up with gifts and then we went out to do girl stuff :). Their birthday is tomorrow and their party is Saturday. After work, we had a nice dinner off the grill and some ice cream cake.

Tomorrow, my girls turn 1. They've been with us a year. One beautiful year. How time does fly. These are my first and my last and I've enjoyed every moment but I feel like it was short. I just keep thinking that I have many, many more years with them. Bring it on! haha :)

Tomorrow we are taking the girls to the aquarium. It should be a fun day :).

Until Wednesday...

I love being a mommy..

I never rocked the girls to sleep. Well I shouldn't say 'never'. There was the occasional time where I would hold one and rock or daddy would. When they were little, they fell asleep with a bottle and we would just them in bed. As they got older, we gave them bottles, baths, books and bed. We put them in bed awake and they would lay down and go to sleep. They never needed to be rocked. Last night, they didn't need to be rocked either but I'm not sure if it's the sudden awareness that they are going to be a year old next week or just the fact that I'm not having any more babies, that I just felt the need to rock them. Together.

Having multiples is hard. Everyone knows this. For me, I get up and change two diapers, make 2 bottles, dress two babies and get them ready for breakfast. Make double the baby food and feed them. After breakfast, one baby wants to be read to and the other baby wants to get into everything. Mommy wants to go to the bathroom, wash her face, brush her teeth, I have to transport two babies into the bathroom with me (since I'm not allowed out of their radar) and try to keep them out of everything while I do it. Two babies make double the mess. You should see the room when they are done.

Going out with them by myself is fun but it isn't. Maybe when they walk, it will be more fun.

Snuggle times. Double the hugs, right? Not when they want mommy to themselves. It ends up being a huge fight over who sits on mommys lap.

Anyway, it's been almost a year and I look back on things that I didn't get to do that I would of done with one baby. Like rock my baby to sleep or sit and cuddle with my baby and enjoy bunches of one on one. Then, I remember that I didn't get to raise one little baby for a year, I got to raise two. I got double the love, double the kisses, double the memories. I have memories for each of them. Katie, we went to the zoo, and you loved the big kitties. You just had to keep staring for what seemed like forever. Karly, You got so excited when you saw the monkeys and the turtles, which is funny because I used to say you looked like a turtle when you were very small and we call you a monkey now because you make monkey noises and crawl around on your feet.

Four days from now, my sweet baby girls will be one. Last night, they didn't need to be rocked but I asked my husband if he would help me get them on my lap and they both lay there in the dark room, Karly with her thumb, Katie with her paci. They talked to each other, sang, and then went quiet. They enjoyed being rocked. Just the three of us for almost an hour. I watched them as they fell asleep and it was beautiful.

Katherine and Karly, I love being your mommy and although at times I cried through the hard times, I've loved every single moment of your first year and look foward to many, many more.

Pictures and stuff..

Karly took some steps today!!! We went to the park and she took 3 steps. I am thrilled!!!!!

Katie has a tooth! Finally! I didn't know if they were ever going to come in or not and she's doing well. A little cranky but well.

Today I found out that the cribs we bought, put together and had our babies sleep in for the last 11 months, were recalled due to suffocation issues. Yes, the crib can break apart and cause death. An 8-month old died in Texas and it's hard to think what could of happened and Thank God my girls are okay but I keep thinking of the poor family who bought this crib in the same faith we did and now their baby is gone.

We took them apart and are taking them back. The girls are now sleeping in pack n plays. If they do okay, we aren't planning on buying them another crib. We plan on switching to toddler beds when they start walking really well. When they understand mommy says stay in bed (hahahahahahahahahahahaha) or when I feel it's time to start.

The pictures below are just of Katie. Karly was cranky today and opted out of the photo taking. Hopefully I will lots of cute ones tomorrow so we will have lots to post. Katie was playing in the pool and there is water but just a tiny bit. Daddy put a little rip in it so the middle tube deflated and I wasn't going to fill up a pool I have to replace tomorrow. My little lady bug.....

Pictures (new post below)

Today seems to be better...

Yesterday was a day from hell. Hubby and I kept fighting while we were out, then I get home and there is a message for me from someone that I had let an outstanding bill go for 9 years and now they wanted the money. 2 hours on the phone and 1,154.49 later, I have it taken care of. Can you believe they wanted me to pay over 5,000$$ for fees!!! I didn't even know about it. Problem: Just young and stupid. Then ppl at work were getting on my nerves and by the end of the day, I felt as if I didn't have a friend in the world. But then there are my kids. I held them tight, played with them, gave them lots of kisses and then when they went to bed, I cried myself to sleep. BUT that was yesterday. It's over.

Today I took Karly for her bloodwork. I was worried so much that I felt sick but you know what? It went just fine. She cried but then again so do I when I get bloodwork done haha. It's over and I'm sure it will come back fine. She's just a skinny kid. Although she shouldn't be losing weight. So hopefully she'll of gained at our 1 year check up. I don't have much else to report.

They are both standing up and Karly is trying to walk! I love it. I'm probably alone in this but I can't wait until they can walk. I'm really looking foward to it.