"You have good, beautiful babies"....

Is what the dr said as I told him the PPD wasn't going away. He said I should be happy, and I'm not. I tried to explain that I am happy with my children and I love them dearly but I couldn't stop crying long enough to explain it. I'm just sad. It's not that I don't love my girls or my life, I'm just sad. Sad all the freakin' time. I'm uptight. I want people to stop talking to me.
Them: "Are they twins?"
Me: "Are you stupid? NO, they're not. The hospital was having buy one get one..."
Them: "Boy/Girl"
Me: "Yes, I dress my boy in PINK to throw stupid people off but I couldn't fool you!"
etc etc etc...
I wish I could say I've never actually said this but I have. Once when I was at a table waiting for for our food to arrive. I mostly just mumble under my breath and dart away. In all honesty, I should be happy to have people fall over themselves trying to see my girls...but I don't.

Post Partum depression sucks!!!!

The therapist says...

• You had a difficult time getting pregnant
• You have a history of anxiety and depression
• You didn't have a good delivery (it ended with me getting pumped with zanax)
• You had twins
• You do it by yourself
• No family visited you in the hospital, where you stayed for 5 days, mostly alone

What did you think was going to happen?

Oh I DON'T KNOW! Maybe I thought it would dandelions and puppy dogs.......

EDITED: He put me on Prozac...