Tuesday, July 1, 2008

36 weeks 2 days..

13 days until c section.

  • I'm seriously hormonal. Everything makes me tear up and most of the time causes crying. Also, the third trimester exhaustion is no joke :). I feel like I've just recovered from an illness and I feel like I have enough energy to do something but after about an hour, I'm ready for bed again.

  • It's only 13, well actually about 12 since it's after 9 pm.

  • We have an appointment tomorrow for another Biophysical Profile and I hope the girls are continuing to grow and are still comfy and healthy in their rather tight living conditions. I keep telling them that in two weeks, they will have a wonderfully comfortable place to live and they only have to wait 12 more days :). We decided to invite *gulp* my mother in law to the u/s tomorrow. My hubby thought it would nice for her to see the u/s, she's never seen one in person before, and who am I to deny my hubby from sharing this with his mother. I'm not sure if it's going to be the best idea but the girls are his too. Also, we need to show her where the hospital is because she doesn't know how to get there on her own. Wish us luck :).

Today was somewhat of an emotional day for me. A few weeks ago, my hubby went to the eye doctor for a vision check up. During the visit, it was found that he had too much pressure in his eyes and that was pointing to Gluacoma. Today he had a follow up and it was even worse. No blockages and no vision loss but because the pressure was even worse he was given eye drops to help. The eye drops are supposed to ease the pressure and reverse the situation. He'll have to do them forever, but he'll be able to see. I was called back to ask if he should do the eyedrops. "Of course, he needs the eye drops. I want his eyes to be okay." Why are they asking me? Unfortunatly, the eye drops will change the color of his eyes to brown. Permanently. I love the color of my husbands eyes. They are a beautiful hazel. They are him. I want our baby girls to have his eyes. What was I going to say to the dr? NO, He can't do the eye drops, give him something else that may not work? I stood by my original answer but when I got home, the tears wouldn't stop. It's just a color but I care. When husband was laying down reading, I decided to tell him how I felt and he said he would call the dr and get something else but no, I won't let him. I can't believe how much this is affecting me though. I feel silly and somewhat selfish. My husband has to continue meds during the rest of his life for a serious eye problem and all I'm doing is crying the medicine is going to turn his eyes brown.

That's been my day.


Sandi said...

Maybe it's more about how much change is going on in your life right now than being "selfish". And maybe before he starts having eye color changes, you could get a few close-up photos of the color for you own - they might come in handy for comparing to the girls' eyes when they're older anyway!

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry to hear about his condition. That sounds really serious. I know you feel bad, I'd be upset also since my husband has such beautiful blue eyes. Take lots of pictures now, I guess!


Tracy said...

I'm sorry...I'd be disappointed if my husband's eye color changed, too. I think taking pictures is a great idea.